“It’s time I said this. Take a good hard look at my chest. Don’t feel weird doing it. There is nothing sacred or sexual left to see.
What is there for you to see is a hollowed arm pit. Breast cancer spreads first to your underarm lymph nodes. Seeing as mine was under my left arm, they removed all of my lymph nodes; a lot of tissue. You may also note an incision that is disfigured as this kept opening up post surgery.
While I can see that the pink ribbon brings comfort to so me… I want you to know that breast cancer is ugly. It’s not an easy or a glam cancer to have. In fact cancers are one & the same to me. Cells run wild. Immune system compromised.
It robbed me of a precious part of myself that I once nourished my children with. It took away part of my sexual identity. Now that’s if we’re just talking about my breasts or my former breasts I’ll say.
When I chose to not have reconstruction it was for many reasons but most importantly it was because my children had seen me down enough. I wanted them to see me strong again. I wanted them to have their Mother they knew.
Until recently I have been very comfortable with my decision. However… The great bathroom debate of 2016 has hurt more than just the transgender community.
It has hurt us survivors. Recently I notice more eyes trying to figure me out. At the grocery store, restaurants … Walmart was the worst. I want to scream, ‘YES! You are seeing it right! This is Breast Cancer… Please check yourself!’ But instead I let my eyes meet theirs in an almost plea for a change in what has become our society.
I am personally of the belief that no transgender person wants to cause trouble in a bathroom. People just want to use the restroom. There have been terrible acts happening in public restrooms long before this. This is why my children never use a public restroom without me. You don’t have to agree with me; I don’t have to agree with you. It’s ok.
Persons undergoing cancer treatment or post cancer treatment may lack hair; wear a baseball hat. They may have undergone a mastectomy like myself. Please consider these things. Rant over.”
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