Refusing to surrender her power to online trolls, social media influencer Alicia Mccarvell graciously responds to harsh judgments but also reminds people that she won’t always be the “bigger person.”
After being swarmed with hateful comments, Mccarvell, a plus-sized TikTok star, delivered a gentle warning on her Instagram, directed to followers who attack her weight and marriage to Scott, in what she calls a “mixed-body relationship.”
Mccarvel wrote, “I may be fat but I assure you I won’t always be the bigger person,” along with the caption, “Let this serve as a reminder that in my space, we match energy. If you are disrespectful, you can expect the same in return. Creators do not owe anyone kindness simply because we have a platform. Don’t come into our space and expect us to be the bigger people, that’s not how this works.”
Canadian-born Alicia Mccarvell, 33, and husband Scott Mccarvell–a hockey player and fitness guru–are high school sweethearts whose lives, broadcast on social media, are vulnerable to public lashing.
Some followers don’t get it, while others marvel over their enviable connection.
One fan recently posted, “Wild to me that anyone questions your relationship just because of your body type. That man is OBSESSED with you and you can see it in his eyes. The same way we can see the way you love him! You’re about to be broke if they start charging rent for the space you take up in their heads.”
Scott, who’s beholden to the beauty of his wife, openly admires Mccarvell and is dismissive of comments suggesting he should be with a woman whose body is more his equal.
In 2021, Scott posted a photo on Instagram, of him and his wife. The heart-melting caption reads, “Recently, I’ve read a lot of comments about the way I look at you. People say it’s staged now, but the truth is it’s always been that way. You’re my favorite view, and you always will be. Our lives have changed drastically in the past 3 years, and we’ve been privileged to see some amazing sights. Looking into your eyes will always be my favorite.”
In the fall of 2022, he posted a photo of the pair on a trip to Nashville, Tennessee. In his sweet caption, he writes, “The only Tennisee @aliciamccarvell” (the only ten-i-see”).
But, trolls still flood Mccarvell’s posts with offensive comments.
After jumping on the trend where couples post videos of a transition–casual to glam–Mccarvell and Scott went viral. Starting in a towel, the adorable couple then appeared dressed up and triggered a tsunami of comments.
Mccarvell wrote, “Let’s address the trash beauty standards in the room. She continued by saying in her post, “By beauty standards we don’t make sense, the world looks at us and immediately values Scott more than me. Since we don’t add up, people try to add things to my situation, my side of the equation, to make it make sense, by saying things like ‘oh she must not have been fat when they met,’ or ‘she’s gotta be rich.’ Or they try to decrease his side of the equation by saying things like ‘he must be gay’ or ‘he fetishes fat women.’”
Blocking out the noise is never easy for anyone, and Mccarvell revealed that her self-doubt caused significant challenges in her marriage. But now, realizing that her husband’s love can’t be shaken, she’s on a journey of self-acceptance and self-love. Also she knows that her handsome husband genuinely values her sense of humor, dedication, and kind heart–immaterial qualities that have nothing to do with her size.
Mccarvell, an advocate for body positivity, is a former bodybuilder who was once sculpted by vigorous workouts. She confessed that she was wrong in believing that being thin would allow her to live “blissfully,” and even wrote on her TikTok that she once “loathed” herself.
Leaning on her fabulous sense of humor and motivated by the love-hate relationship she has with her own body, the influencer went on a mission to help people transform the relationships they have with their bodies.
Right before hosting the 2023 BodCom, a virtual conference on body confidence and self-acceptance, the TikTok star spoke with TODAY.com. She explained that her move to work in the online space came after a 2019 trend circulating on TikTok about women who have “hot husbands.”
Mccarvell knew she and her husband would go viral.
She was right, and within 48 hours of posting her first TikTok video, Mccarvell’s audience had grown to 56,000 followers. Today, she has almost 6 million followers.
“That’s when I knew that my body was always going to be a part of the equation when it came to my content,” Mccarvell said on TODAY.com, addressing society’s beauty standards.
She continued, “I quickly realized, struggling through these things, that regardless of how my body looked, I was always going to be … the funny friend. I was always going to be a good partner, I was always going to be a hard worker. And if people couldn’t see past my fat body to see all of those cool things, that wasn’t my responsibility.”
She added, “And if people couldn’t see past my fat body to see all of those cool things, that wasn’t my responsibility. That was their responsibility.”
It takes a lot of strength for someone to be the bigger person and love themselves regardless of public scrutiny. We’re so happy to see the love shared by Alicia and Scott! What are your thoughts on social media trends, like the hot husband one, that invite public criticism?