Jenny Mollen revealed that she hopes her sons one day marry women with “dead mothers” in a controversial essay.
In a Substack essay published on May 10, Mollen reflected on motherhood, raising two boys, and the emotions that come with watching children grow up.
Mollen shares sons Sid, 12, and Lazlo, 8, with actor Jason Biggs, 48. The couple split last month, according to Page Six.
Jenny Mollen on raising boys
The essay, titled “Please. Stay. I want you. I need you. Oh, God,” opened with a bold statement: “Call me old-fashioned, but I only want my sons to marry women with dead mothers. It’s my only shot at staying relevant, of seeming useful, and of winning by comparison,” she wrote, according to Tyla.
“Having boys is a mind f**k. It builds you up, only to tear you apart.”
Throughout the post, she then reflected on how her perspective has changed over the years. She admitted that she once struggled to understand why her mother-in-law became emotional when Biggs told her he was getting married. At the time, she said she found the reaction “insane.” Now, she sees it differently.
“I was eating her son, straight out of the fridge, without even asking for a plate,” Mollen wrote.
She went on to describe the challenge of watching her children become less dependent on her.
“When I was young, I was every mother’s nightmare,” she wrote. “I dismantled boys by accident, I destroyed their lives, wrote about it extensively, then got personally offended when they no longer wanted to be my friend.”
She continued: “I said, ‘I love you,’ when I didn’t mean it. I sometimes kissed people just to make them go away. I’ve never been broken up with. I’ve never been into someone who wasn’t just slightly more into me.”
“The longest goodbye of my life”
Mollen then joked that karma may eventually catch up with her, writing: “Most likely in the form of some crazy b***h who is going to weaponise my flaws in therapy and melt all my jewellery.”
She imagined a future where another woman becomes the center of her sons’ lives.
“Her mom will be the one to watch the grandkids and join them for family vacations. I’ll be the lonely old woman wandering the Grove on Fairfax, waiting for my five pm table for one at the f**king Marmalade cafe.”
The writer also recalled a situation from several months ago involving her oldest son.
“My eldest was texting with a girl, she was twelve, but I could already tell my brand of toxic,” Mollen wrote. “She was bossing him around and using big words, and he was utterly spun.”
She admitted wanting to step in before her son got hurt.
“I complained to Jason that I wanted to intervene before he got hurt and that she wasn’t even hotter than me.”
Later in the essay, Mollen argued that motherhood can bring out unexpected emotions even in people who are generally well-adjusted. She ultimately described raising sons as “the longest goodbye of my life” before ending the essay with one final joke: “I pray that at least one of them is gay.”
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