A woman has taken to Reddit’s “Am I The A*****e” forum to recount the moment she realized her brother-in-law was taking advantage of her older sister… And she handled it in the best way.
The Original Poster (OP), 24, detailed her 32-year-old sister’s struggles with a seemingly inept husband, aged 38, who exhibited weaponized incompetence despite her sister’s demanding responsibilities.
OP explained that her pregnant sister was holding down a full-time job, managing the household, and caring for her four children (aged 10, eight, five, and three) while her husband contributed virtually nothing to his family. Notably, OP highlighted that her sister earned more than her husband.
“My sister works a full time job (40+ hours a week), cleans her entire house, cooks, takes care of all her children without him doing ANYTHING,” OP said.
She continued: “It is seriously mind blowing that she wakes up at like 4 am, cooks breakfast, does chores, gets all of her kids ready for school, takes them all to school and daycare and all he does is stay home and work and when his kids get home (after my sister picks them up of course) he will play with them for a little and play video games until he falls asleep.”
OP stayed with her sister
When OP and her fiancé, 26, stayed with her sister for six weeks due to home renovations, they saw how busy she was and helped her out in any way they could, which visibly lifted the sister’s spirits. OP assisted in caring for the children, and her fiancé even drove her sister to doctor’s appointments. In contrast, the husband only showed up as a parent when others were around, portraying himself as a hardworking father.
OP explained that her brother-in-law was the one who wanted more children, despite her sister’s desire to stop having children.
The woman, who had never gotten along with her brother-in-law, had noticed his toxic behavior since the birth of their eight-year-old son. “I’ve tried talking to her about leaving but she doesn’t want her kids to grow up in a broken home,” OP explained.
The Thanksgiving dinner
Fast-forward a few weeks to a pre-Thanksgiving potluck hosted by OP’s pregnant sister and brother-in-law, where tensions peaked. Both OP’s family and her lazy brother-in-law’s family were there.
Anticipating the husband’s lack of involvement, the woman stayed with her sister to help prepare. When the topic of OP and her fiancé starting their own family arose, the brother-in-law made an off-hand comment about fatherhood being hard, which triggered OP’s frustration.
“I snapped and said ‘like you would know’ he looked taken aback and asked me what I meant and I unloaded on him, calling him a pathetic excuse for a man who makes my 8 months pregnant sister do everything for their family. I went off for a solid 10 minutes and he sat there shrinking in his seat. I left,” OP wrote.
The following day, OP’s pregnant sister called her to thank her and to let her know that she appreciated OP standing up for her. Her brother-in-law, however, was not so understanding, sending a nasty text to OP and telling her she was a terrible person because she “lied” in front of his whole family.
As it turns out, the brother-in-law’s mother was furious at him and decided to move in with OP’s sister and brother-in-law to help out. He also said in the text that he was now the laughing stock of his whole family.
What did people think?
People on Reddit were extremely supportive of OP, with one person writing: “I think it was the perfect time. Both families got to hear exactly what OP said so he couldn’t go make up lies to his family and make them attack her! Some people deserve to be put on blast especially with how he goes around acting like he’s the s**t lol.”
Someone else added: “Not only did you speak the truth to a guy with learned helplessness, you also seem to have gotten some positive help for your sister. Seriously, if he’s that bad, he deserves to be a laughing stock. Maybe that will bring some more positive change, whether it’s his finally helping, or your sister leaving him.”
What do you think of this situation? Let us know in the comments!
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