Often, people wonder what their dreams mean and turn to the internet or those they know for insight into them.
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Sometimes we experience strange dreams that don’t make a lot of sense. A lot of times, sexual dreams can occur, which can cause a lot of confusion. If you ever have a sexual dream about an ex, a co-worker, or a friend, it does not mean you have feelings for them.
Even if you know this fact, a dream of such nature can often cause feelings of guilt and being a bad person, especially if you are in a relationship with someone.
Author Deirdre Leigh Barrett of The Committee of Sleep, there are several reasons you can have such dreams, and a lot of them are harmless.
“Dreams just don’t observe those boundaries [that you’d follow in real life],” she said in an interview.
A study by a bedding company in 2022 revealed that 20 percent of women had dreams of cheating in the last 12 months. If you have issues with dreams, such as things, Barrett advises that you have a talk together about what you consider ‘cheating’ with one another. This could help ease some anxiety you feel in regards to such dreams.
Dream analyst and member of the International Association for the Study of Dreams (IASD), Lauri Loewenberg also chimed in on the topic and said, “In my research and experience helping my clients understand their cheating dreams, I have found the main reason you cheat in your dreams is because—deep down—you have guilt or concern about something you’re doing that is taking away from the time you should be putting into the relationship.”
She also shared that a lack of excitement or passion in relationships could also be a factor in guilt-ridden dreams, as well as a past of engaging in infidelity.
“Cheating dreams are rarely about sex but are, more often, a brutally honest reflection of the dynamics within the relationship,” she elaborated.
“Infidelity can be traumatic and very difficult to heal from. Even if it has been years or decades since the transgression, the emotional scar often remains. This includes the scar of guilt with the transgressor,” Loewenberg said.
But if you are the affected party in the relationship, Loewenberg says, “It’s often something your partner is giving their time and attention to that causes you to feel left out and ‘cheated’ out of that time you want with them.”
While dreams of this nature can be stressful, it might be worthwhile to talk to your partner about them.
“Talking about things in transparency and in an engaging way is the most helpful thing,” she says to people concerned about them.
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