After spending the first 45 years of his life without a penis, Andrew Wardle finally lost his virginity following a life-changing operation – and says he’s thrilled with his “ridiculously big” member.
Andrew Wardle, 54, has become one of the world’s best-known advocates for people born with severe urological birth defects, sharing his story in the hope that others facing similar challenges know they are not alone.
His condition, called bladder exstrophy, affects roughly one in 20 million people.
According to the Mayo Clinic, bladder exstrophy is a rare condition present at birth where a baby’s bladder develops outside the abdomen during pregnancy. Because the bladder is exposed, it cannot store urine or function normally after birth.
Wardle’s case was even more complex.
Recurring health problems
Born without a penis, Wardle also had only one testicle, and his bladder developed outside his body.
Although doctors reconstructed his bladder during childhood so he could urinate, they were unable to create a penis.
The medical challenges shaped nearly every stage of his early life.
He underwent 15 operations to build a tube from his bladder, allowing him to pass urine normally, while also dealing with recurring kidney problems. His mother was only 17 when he was born and, faced with the overwhelming medical needs of her newborn son, made the heartbreaking decision to place him for adoption.
‘Sick of the cycle’
Wardle spent years keeping his condition hidden from classmates, friends and the women he dated, fearing how they would react once they learned the truth.
One girlfriend, he told The Sun, even punched him in the face when he shared his big secret.
“It wasn’t a sad time, but I was sick of the cycle of meeting a girl, then telling her and it ending. I didn’t want to do that anymore,” Wardle explained.
That realization led him to share his story publicly in the 2015 documentary The Man with No Penis, where Wardle explained he had even kept his condition from his longtime girlfriend, Fedra Fabian.
“I told [Fedra] I had a microchip in my kidney, I had kidney infections and stuff so she wouldn’t touch my kidney, she wouldn’t touch anywhere, and it kind of kept her away,” he said.
‘Ridiculously big’
The public revelation was followed by another life-changing milestone. Three years later, surgeons performed a phalloplasty – a complex reconstructive operation – fitting Wardle with a mechanical penile implant in a procedure reportedly costing about $92,725.
“My operation is one of the most expensive ever done because the surgeons had to build me a bladder and everything,” he told The Sun. “I imagined it would be some horrible-looking thing, but when [doctor] showed me pictures, I was amazed. I decided to go for it as no relationship can last the way I was. I wanted to see how normal I could become.”
The 10-hour procedure involved reconstructing a bionic penis using tissue from his left arm and right leg before surgeons completed the process by inserting a tube that allows him to inflate the implant – or his “ridiculously big” member.
‘Cherry on the cake’
Not long after recovering from surgery, Wardle and Fabian crossed a milestone they had waited years to reach.
“It was nice and natural – and that’s how I wanted it to be,” Wardle said of losing his virginity to his girlfriend of six years. “After what Fedra and I have been through, it’s the cherry on the cake.”
Asked what it felt like to lose his virginity at 45, Wardle said “it was just really magical.”
“It was just lovely to make the next step and open that door, but it wasn’t forced,” he said, according to the Mirror.
The experience was equally emotional for Fabian, who reflected on what the moment meant for their relationship.
“It was a celebration of our love. His penis looks normal, it’s just operated a little bit differently,” Fabian told The Sun. “When you say Andrew lost his virginity, that’s not really the case because you think of someone who doesn’t know what they’re doing.
“Andrew knew what he was doing.”
‘Weird relationship’ with sex
Although the surgery transformed what was physically possible, Wardle says the emotional scars left by decades of bullying and painful medical procedures have taken much longer to heal.
“That part of my body was always linked to pain, not pleasure, so I have a weird relationship with it at the moment. Sex never meant anything to me before, because I had to switch that off in my mind,” he told The Sun.
“But I’m hoping, with help from counselling, that will come to me properly in time. It’s a long journey and it will take time for everything to heal, but I’m really pleased with it and looking forward to my future.”
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