Weddings can be a chaotic time for everyone involved, not just the bride and groom.
From the bridesmaids’ outfits to the flowers to hiring the venue – often there’s no expense spared to make it the perfect day!
So, when this woman’s cousins were in the midst of planning their own big day, they leapt on the chance to have her splash some cash on them – especially once they found out how much she earns! Keep reading to find out what happened…
In a recent post on the ‘Am I the A*****e‘ subreddit, a 19-year-old woman, known on Reddit as u/HumblePossibility548, sought advice regarding a disagreement with extended family members over her cousin’s wedding expenses.
The young woman explained that she comes from a large Mexican family and has had a challenging relationship with her extended family due to religious differences and her struggles with ADHD, depression, and anxiety. “When I was younger, my family would say that I must’ve done something bad for God to give me the issues that I still struggle with today. This was the main reason why I decided to keep my distance,” she wrote.
In November, her cousin got engaged, and the woman congratulated her, expressing genuine happiness. Around the same time, the young woman started a well-paying job, despite facing challenges with ADHD. She excelled in school, earning two Associates at the age of 18 and detailed how she was currently pursuing her junior year in college.
When the family gathered to finalize wedding plans, the cousins bombarded her with questions about her life, education, and career. The revelation of her salary surprised them, as she explained: “I make a little more than my dad, I help my mom with her bills, and I even spoil my little brother. I am proud with how much I make because it wasn’t easy to get to where I am now.”
A few days later, the cousin called her, asking about her contribution to the wedding, citing Mexican wedding traditions where family members help financially. “I told her that if we weren’t close enough for her to ask me to be a maid, what made her think that I would just put down hundreds of dollars for a wedding that’s happening next month,” she wrote on her post.
Refusing the request, she pointed out the lack of closeness in their relationship and the sudden expectation for financial support. When the cousin’s mother (bride’s mother) contacted her, the young woman expressed her dissatisfaction with the sudden demand for money.
“I explained to her that I did not appreciate how she calls me after finding out about my salary and just dropping this bill on me,” the woman wrote. “She continued to give me options as if I was going to pick one. I told my aunt that it’s my hard earned money and I choose how I spend it.”
Now facing criticism from her family for not contributing financially, the young woman sought opinions on whether she was in the wrong for refusing to contribute to the wedding.
As expected, Reddit users did not believe she was in the wrong, jumping in with their own opinions on the matter.
“No one is under any obligation to pay for a wedding except the couple getting married. And next time someone asks your salary, don’t tell them!” one user wrote.
Someone else added: “I came here to say this. Just because you landed a good job doesn’t mean that you are suddenly responsible for funding her wedding. People getting married shouldn’t be relying on other people’s money in their wedding budget unless it was already promised to them (and confirmed as situations change, like job loss, etc.).”
A further comment suggested that “it wouldn’t end with this wedding,” and that the woman “would be expected to fund all sorts of family member events going forward.”
What do you think of this situation? Let us know in the comments!
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